A hard day’s night

I broke the shower curtain rail yesterday and I don’t think I was meant to.

He babe was in the bathroom and I thought I’d keep him company. I’m not really allowed in the bathroom but the door was left open so I wanted to explore a bit. It’s a small room really and I don’t like the bath thing. It’s not very comfortable to sit in, it’s cold and it’s hard to get out of. I got in it yesterday and then wanted to jump onto the toilet but the bath is slippy, so I held onto the curtain and was going to climb over, but the rail broke and fell off the wall. It made a really big crash and broke the china handle thing for the shower off and it smashed where she’d stuck it together before, and he swore! She babe came to have a look at all the noise but by then I was sitting on my worktop in the kitchen. I thought she might think he babe had done it but he told her it was me and I think he swore again! She said “Well that’s why I don’t let him in there babe.” And he said “I was just cleaning my teeth.” I knew it was his fault.

When I was a tiny kitten the lodger who was in the spare room for a while broke the rail too and they didn’t try to stop her going in there, even when he was cleaning his teeth. She said she’d slipped and grabbed the curtain, just like I did! – but he didn’t swear at her. Not so she could hear anyway. They should be a bit more sensitive to my feelings. I’m still only 10 months and two weeks old.

There’s a bath in the garden for the birds but it’s too small for me. It’s OK to have a little drink from sometimes, but the pigeons use it as a toilet as well and I don’t really like it when they do that.

Anyway, after all the excitement I went outside and found a huge beetle to play with. I needed something to take my mind off the neglect. He babe came to look and said it was a ‘stag beetle’ and she pointed her phone at it and followed it for ages. She said she was filming it, but it didn’t speak or anything. She does everything with her phone. I kept trying to splat it – the beetle not the phone! – but they kept splatting me so I couldn’t! Then it stretched its wings out so she screamed and ran down the garden waving her hands around. She looked really silly and he babe and I just stared at her really. Sometimes we don’t know what to do with her. I wanted to laugh but I didn’t want them to think I’d forgotten about the incident in the bathroom.

I’ve been a bit distant with them on and off lately – I’m just trying to be more independent, that’s all – but they’ve bought some nice soft snuggley covers for the beds now, so I’m not sleeping on the sofa as much and at least I’m a bit more comfortable. My hammocky nearly touches the floor when I get in it! Why does everything keep shrinking? The babes should complain; they must have stopped using the hammocky a long time ago ‘cos they’re much bigger than me. Maybe that’s why they got me, so I could have their hand-me-downs.

I’m quite ‘hard done by’ really… did you know, they went somewhere last weekend, on the Friday, and didn’t come home until Monday night! I didn’t mind because my granny came to stay and I love her – but I still had to pretend to be cross with them when they got back because they shouldn’t just leave me like that. They know I like to travel and get out and about. And they went in her car, and they KNOW I look good in it!

I had a nice time with my granny though; it was good to have a bit more attention paid to me. The babe’s get distracted very easily and I think they sometimes forget that I’m there, but my granny played with me a lot and I showed her all my skills in the garden – especially my latest fly catching manoeuvres. I think she was quite impressed by how much I’ve grown up. I’m not just a silly little kitten playing with toys anymore (I just do that to entertain people really). I’m onto the real thing now.

The babes had gone somewhere called the ‘Isle of Wight’ to see lots of bands and listen to music at a ‘festival’. I don’t see why they couldn’t do that here, but whatever keeps them happy I suppose. She brought me back a cuddly toy bee. Well, I’ve grown out of bees now (well… mostly… it’s just that I’m into flies and beetles at the moment, as you know) and SHE should have known that, so I pulled one of its ears off. Oh, but they said a beetle played at the festival! That’s just not fair! Why wasn’t I there? I wish I could have been there. I’d have pulled his wings off.

Oh blah di. Just another day in the life.

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